In The Car.

because I am in the car.

Today is the first time I'm blogging in the car. Hahaha :) My parents, sister and I are on the way to Kuantan right now to our kampung for raya. My elder sister is already there. I can't wait to see her! :) This year we are going to raya in Kuantan. To be honest I still don't have the raya mood :( I don't know why. This is sad. But I know I'm going to be happy when I meet my cousins back in Kuantan. I kinda miss them. To top it all off my best friend is going to celebrate raya in Kuantan too! Yeay! :) Hahaha. It's now 1851. I guess we are going to have our Iftar on the road. Alhamdulillah. Thank you Allah for the food that we have in the car :) It was papa's idea to go get some food at the bazaar Ramadhan. It was fun picking the food I wanted with papa and my sister. Hahahaha (: I'm hungry. Kbye.

<2 sloth

Chill.

because I should do this more.

I should chill. Make the best of what I've got. Hahahaha. Why am I so tense. What ever happens it is God's will so I have to accept that. POSITIVITY~! :)

<2 sloth

Broken Hearted Girl by Beyonce.

because I can totally relate to this song right now.                                                                                                                                 


You’re everything I thought you never were
And nothing like I thought you could’ve been
But still you live inside of me
So tell me how is that?

You’re the only one I wish I could forget
The only one I’d love enough to not forgive
And though you break my heart, you’re the only one
And though there are times when I hate you
Cause I can’t erase
The times that you hurt me
And put tears on my face
And even now while I hate you
It pains me to say
I know I’ll be there at the end of the day

I don’t wanna be without you babe
I don’t want a broken heart
Don’t wanna take a breath with out you babe
I don’t wanna play that part
I know that I love you
But let me just say
I don’t want to love you in no kind of way no no
I don’t want a broken heart
And I don’t wanna play the broken-hearted girl...No...No
No broken-hearted girl
I’m no broken-hearted girl

Something that I feel I need to say
But up to now I’ve always been afraid
That you would never come around
And still I want to put this out
You say you’ve got the most respect for me
But sometimes I feel you’re not deserving me
And still you’re in my heart
But you’re the only one and yes
There are times when I hate you
[ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/b/beyonce-lyrics/broken,,hearted-girl-lyrics.html ]
But I don’t complain
Cause I’ve been afraid that you would've walk away
Oh but now I don’t hate you
I’m happy to say
That I will be there at the end of the day

I don’t wanna be without you babe
I don’t want a broken heart
Don’t wanna take a breath with out you babe
I don’t wanna play that part
I know that I love you
But let me just say
I don’t want to love you in no kind of way no no
I don’t want a broken heart
And I don’t wanna play the broken-hearted girl...No…No
No broken-hearted girl

Now I’m at a place I thought I’d never be…Oooo
I’m living in a world that’s all about you and me…yeah
Ain't gotta be afraid my broken heart is free
To spread my wings and fly away
Away With you
yeah yeah yeah, ohh ohh ohh

I don’t wanna be without my baby
I don’t wanna a broken heart
Don’t want to take a breath with out my baby
I don’t wanna play that part
I know that I love you
But let me just say
I don’t want to love you in no kind of way..No..No
I don’t want a broken heart
I don’t wanna play the broken-hearted girl..No..No..
No broken-hearted girl
Broken-hearted girl No…no…
No broken-hearted girl
No broken-hearted girl

<2 sloth

Just Dont Cross The Line.

because I have feelings too.

I am slowly getting hurt more and more. You are really public with girls huh? Dont you see me standing here all this while? I am patient. Maybe too patient. I am so scared. I never want to prove myself wrong cause right now my heart is being tested. My loyalty towards you is being tested. It seem so much easier if I just give up. So so so much easier. You dont see me breaking down. You dont see me crying. YOU DONT! It would really suck if when I start acting like you are now you'd stop doing what you're doing because by then the tables will be turned and I have no idea how much or how long would you be patient to wait for me. Would you wait? I'll never know.

<2 sloth

Hmmm.

because I just want to sit hear in peace.

I'm sitting all alone outside my house with my guitar beside me, the cold night air blow my hair, strokes my soul, keeping me calm, while the thunder in the sky, makes me stay, just to see the first raindrop fall. I love this feeling. Me. Alone. At peace with the world.

<2 sloth

Why Do I Even Bother?

because everytime I do I get disappointed.

I believe that sometimes people can change and people can start appreciating what they have but sadly they dont. It feels so good to be unappriciated. Guees Im better off alone.

<2 sloth

What Am I To Do?

because right now I dont know what to do.

Should I tell him how I feel? Should I just ignore this nagging feeling and chill? What is the right thing to do? I know that whatever I do it is going to hurt just as much. What am I to do when I miss you so but I cant do anything about it? I am just going to go see him when he comes back and that will be it for now. For now I have decided to go see him. The rest will be up to God's will. At least no matter what I know I have fun just being with him even if it is for awhile. FOREVER ALONE :)

<2 sloth